Ladies, let’s be real. You’re a catch. You’ve survived life, love, and loss, and now you’re dipping your toe back into the digital dating pool. But instead of being flooded with messages from adoring suitors, you’re left staring at an empty inbox, wondering, What am I doing wrong?
Fear not, my widow warrior! If you’re not getting the matches you deserve, it’s not you, it’s your profile. The good news? A few tweaks can turn those left swipes into eager right swipes. Let’s dive into the 12 reasons men are swiping left, and how to fix them!
1. Your Photos Are… Questionable
Blurry pics, group shots where no one knows which one is you, or worse, pictures with your ex (rest in peace, but let’s move forward). Men are visual creatures; they want to see you!
Fix it:
- Use 3-5 high-quality photos.
- Make sure at least one is a clear headshot and one is a full-body pic.
- Keep it recent, no catfishing yourself!
2. Your Bio Reads Like a Resume
“Dedicated mother of three, hardworking, loyal, and looking for stability.” Yawn. You’re dating, not applying for a mortgage.
Fix it:
- Inject some personality!
- Show, don’t tell. Instead of “I love to travel,” try “Just got back from Italy, ask me about the wine fiasco.”
3. You’re Too Mysterious
“Just ask me” is not a bio. It’s laziness. No one wants to play detective just to figure out if they should swipe right.
Fix it:
- Give a little something intriguing, like: “Part-time bookworm, full-time sarcasm enthusiast. Looking for someone who can keep up.”
4. Too Many Selfies
We get it, you mastered the front camera. But men are not impressed by 20 bathroom selfies.
Fix it:
- Add variety: a candid shot, an outdoor adventure, or a fun pic with friends (but not too many!).
5. Your First Photo is a Dealbreaker
Duck lips? Snapchat filter with dog ears? A picture of your cat? Swipe left.
Fix it:
- Make your first pic the best version of you. Smile, look approachable, and make eye contact with the camera.
6. You’re Giving Off “Bitter Ex” Vibes
“Not looking for liars, cheaters, or losers.” Yikes. Even if it’s true, this screams baggage.
Fix it:
- Keep your bio positive. Focus on what you do want, not what you don’t.
7. You Sound Too Desperate
“Ready to find my forever person!” Girl, slow down. No one wants to feel like they’re stepping into a lifetime contract on date #1.
Fix it:
- Keep it light. “Looking for someone who can make me laugh and isn’t afraid of spontaneous road trips.” Sounds way more fun, right?
8. Overuse of Emojis
“Looking for someone to be my partner-in-crime who loves and .”
Men are confused. This is a dating profile, not a rebus puzzle.
Fix it:
- Use words. One or two emojis? Fine. A whole emoji novel? Hard pass.
9. You’re Not Making the First Move
Ladies, this isn’t Victorian England. If you match, say something! And please, not just “Hey.”
Fix it:
- Open with something interesting. Comment on a photo, a shared interest, or throw in a playful tease.
10. You’re Stuck in the Past
Mentioning your late husband in every other sentence can feel heavy. Your loss is part of your story, but your dating profile should be about your future, not your past.
Fix it:
- Acknowledge it in a graceful way (if needed), but keep the focus on who you are now and what you’re looking forward to.
11. You Have Unrealistic Height Requirements
“Must be over 6’0″.” Ma’am. The average American man is 5’9″. Stop eliminating great guys over a few inches (and not those inches, get your mind out of the gutter!).
Fix it:
- Focus on compatibility, humor, and kindness instead of an arbitrary number.
12. Your Profile is Just… Boring
“I like movies, music, and good food.” Wow. So unique. So original. Not.
Fix it:
- Add some spice! “I can quote ‘Bridesmaids’ in my sleep, I make a mean lasagna, and I will 100% beat you at Scrabble.”
Ready to Get More Right Swipes?
Now that you know why men might be passing on your profile, it’s time for a refresh! Keep it light, keep it fun, and most importantly, keep it you.
Have you tried any of these fixes? What’s been your biggest struggle with dating apps? Drop a comment below, I want to hear your stories!