So, you finally decided to dip your toe back into the dating pool. You put on that killer dress, swipe right on an interesting guy, and boom, you’re on a date. But wait… something feels off. He’s charming, sure. But every time he opens his mouth, it’s like his ex is sitting right there with you, sipping on a cocktail and rolling her eyes.
If you’ve ever sat through a date wondering, Is he over his ex, or am I just a temporary distraction?, you’re not alone. Men have a way of revealing their emotional baggage in the weirdest ways. And guess what? It’s your job to notice the red flags before you end up being the emotional support girlfriend.
Let’s dive into seven undeniable signs that a man is NOT over his ex, and how you can save yourself from being his next rebound!
1. He Brings Her Up… Constantly
If his ex’s name keeps slipping into conversation, whether it’s a casual mention or a deep analysis of what went wrong, RUN. This is not just a red flag; it’s a full-blown parade with fireworks. A man who talks about his ex too much isn’t ready for something new, he’s still living in the past.
The Fix:
Casually say, “Wow, you mention her a lot! Are you sure you’re over her?” Watch his reaction. If he stammers, laughs nervously, or says, “Yeah, totally!” (while avoiding eye contact), he’s lying.
2. He Compares You to Her (Even in a ‘Good’ Way)
“You’re so much funnier than my ex.”
“She never used to like sushi, but I love that you do.”
Girl, why is she even in the conversation? Whether he’s saying you’re better or worse, comparisons mean she’s still on his mind. And guess what? You’re not here to audition for the role of ‘Better Version of His Ex’.
The Fix:
Any mention of his ex should be met with, “I’d rather hear about you than your past relationships.” Set the boundary early!
3. He Still Follows Her Every Move on Social Media
If he knows what she had for breakfast, who she hung out with last night, or what inspirational quote she posted this morning, he’s still emotionally invested. Bonus red flag: If he likes all her posts but tells you they ‘never talk.’
The Fix:
Ask, “Do you still keep up with her online?” If he gets defensive, congratulations! You’ve just confirmed your suspicion.
4. He Hasn’t Removed the Couple Pics (Or Worse, Her Stuff Is Still in His Place!)
Ladies, if you walk into his apartment and there’s a framed picture of him and his ex staring at you from the nightstand, abort mission. And if he still has her shampoo, hoodie, or random knick-knacks? Yeah… you’re not dating a single man, you’re dating a nostalgic one.
The Fix:
Joke about it. “Did your last relationship just end… like, yesterday?” See what he says.
5. He Talks About ‘Closure’ but Never Actually Moves On
He swears he’s done with her but still meets up ‘for closure’ or ‘to return her things’ (even though they broke up six months ago). Sweetheart, he’s holding on to hope.
The Fix:
If he’s still in contact with her, ask yourself if you’re okay with being second priority. (Spoiler: You’re not.)
6. He Gets Emotional (or Angry) When Talking About Her
Love and hate are two sides of the same coin. If he gets misty-eyed reminiscing or turns into the Exorcist when her name is mentioned, he’s still emotionally attached.
The Fix:
Tell him, “I’d love to get to know you, but it seems like she’s still a big part of your world.” If he downplays it but you feel the intensity, trust your gut.
7. He Uses You as an Emotional Band-Aid
If he’s constantly seeking validation from you (“You think I’m a good guy, right?”), treats you like a therapist, or moves at lightning speed to get serious, he’s trying to fill the void she left.
The Fix:
If a man is rushing into something deep right after a breakup, he’s not healed. And you are NOT his emotional band-aid. Politely step back.
The Solution? Stop Wasting Time on the Wrong Men!
You deserve a partner who is present, healed, and ready for you. That’s where The Ultimate Widow’s Dating Guide comes in, a game-changing resource designed to help you spot red flags early, attract emotionally available men, and build real connections.
Inside, you’ll discover:
- How to recognize men who are truly ready for love
- The subtle signs that scream ‘emotional baggage’
- Powerful confidence-building techniques to navigate the dating world as a widow
Stop settling for men who can’t let go of the past. Grab your copy of ‘The Ultimate Widow’s Dating Guide’ today and take control of your love life!
What’s Your Biggest Dating Red Flag?
Have you ever dated a man who was clearly not over his ex? Spill the tea in the comments below! Let’s chat!